A letter to my eldest son

We were driving down the road today I was compelled to tell you how wonderful I think you are. I am pretty sure you know, but sometimes it is nice to hear. I am proud of the young man that you have become and I want you to know everyday of your life that you are better than him. I know that this year has been hard and certain things have lost some of there shine. I know that in certain aspects of your life that you have had to move from a childish view of the world to a more grown up view. Please remember every day of your life that you are loved and wanted. The path that someone has chosen is not a reflection of any fault in you, but a reflection of a deep flaw within him. Please trust me when I say that it is not you who is broken, but him. He is a small weak person who has missed out on the greatest gift that was ever given to him. He has missed out on a funny, kind compassionate young man, who is probably one of the most talented human beings to ever grace the face of the earth. I know that he has hurt you and I am sorry for that. I am sorry for the part that I played in causing you that pain. We were young and both broken. Unfortunately he is not capable of fixing what is broken in his soul. I do not think that it is fixable and I think that you are right to walk away. I, on the other hand, know that you are what fixed what was broken with in me. There are few people with the exception of family who knew me before you. Those that are still around will attest to the fact that it was a small boy that grounded me. I had lost my joy in life and I found it in the face of a boy named Evan. I am honored and over joyed to know that I have had a hand in making you the person that you are today. You and Hayden are the greatest joys that I will ever know. In spite of the fact that you are so loved, I still see that you have been hurt by an idiot that I knew years ago. I know that for so long you expected more of him, and have finally excepted that he is incapable of coming through for you. I see you listening to father of mine by Everclear and I know that you feel like you can relate. I see the brief look in your eyes when someone says that you look like him, or sound like him. It used to be a look of pride and as of late it has shifted to a look of disdain. Let me tell you right now - You have only the best parts of that man. You possess a sharp wit and a wry eye for the world. You move like him, you sound like him, but that is it. There is none of the nastiness, the callousness, or the general disregard for everyone but yourself in you. Not one ounce and don't ever think for a minute that there is. The best parts of you come from me and my family and the people who have cared for you and loved you since the day you were born. You are such an amazing person that you managed to just inherit that good parts of a terrible person. Well I have rambled on here long enough. I just wanted to remind you that I love you, think you are wonderful, and am honored to be graced with your presence everyday. You truly are one of my best friends.

I am speechless

Okay so maybe I am not speechless, but I promise I was for a minute. Totally speechless - Which for me is a big deal. I am over it now and ready to rant.

Man oh man. I like Connecticut, I really do. I think that it suits me. How ever if good old CT can't get its act together I may have to start seeing other states. It seems like every time I turn around CT is making the news for being the worst at something. We have the highest achievement gap, we pay the most for gas (yes sir, we now pay more than Alaska and Hawaii) and now we have been publicly embarrassed for our unwillingness to help someone in need. For a minute and 9 seconds no one bothered to help a man who had been struck by a car. The video is absolutely chilling. You can see the cars swerve around the elderly (yes folks to make it even more horrifying the man who was struck was elderly) victim, you can see a moped circle the man and never stop, and you can see people on the sidewalk just gawk. Not a single person offered first aid. No one even bothered to walk over and hold his hand and whisper words of comfort while he waited for emergency help.

So again CT in in the nation news. Watch me.

I do not believe that this sort of behavior is unique to CT. I think that our whole country has learned to turn a blind eye to our neighbors suffering. I am particularly outraged because this happened in my state.

I think that all the caring chill heads that I know in Connecticut need to take a look at this and work together to show people that we know better. We need to create a community that cares for its neighbors and looks out for one and other. Not people who walk by someone who is hurt.

I am sure that everyone is sick of hearing me jump up on a soap box and rant about the need for change. If this doesn't drive the point home I am not sure what will.

Now lets start a revolution.